Uncertain, But Positive

Picture of me.
In my home office.

I have to admit, tonight I’m feeling very uncertain about tomorrow. I start the third semester of college tomorrow to get my certificate as a Web Application Developer. I was laid off from work in February of 2019 due to a company acquisition, after being with the company for eight years. I burned through my unemployment while trying to find work. Then I dove into the Worker Retraining program to get my certificate. I love being creative and programming. I don’t feel that I’m done contributing to society yet. However, I’m 62. I do not want to retire yet. I have great ideas and I’m proving through my college courses that I still have what it takes to rise to the top. I’ve been on the honor roll through the first two semesters and I plan to do it again for my third and final semester.

Unfortunately, the Washington State Worker Retraining program only provides for 26 weeks of benefits, even though my schooling is for three semesters. A month ago, I had four good job leads for technical writing contracts, but those faded away when the Covid-19 virus hit. My Washington State training benefits dried up 3 weeks ago. I hear about extensions for unemployment, but I can’t get through on the phone lines. The Unemployment office has not responded to my recent emails through their website, which is only working 50% of the time when I check it.

I’ve not paid my rent for April. I got a three-month extension on my car payment and a greatly reduced payment on a personal loan I’ve had since I was gainfully employed. I’m behind on utilities. Some of my friends have been very kind and have contributed funds to us. But, I’m an adult, I’m very smart, I have a lot of experience, and yet, I have not been able to find a way to continue gaining an income to support my household. I’m also a creative writer with books available on Amazon and other outlets. But, the sales and recognition have not been enough to support me and my household.

Okay, I know there are a lot of people out there who are facing the same situations and even worse. They have lost loved ones and have not been able to say goodbye due to quarantine restrictions. It is a very sad state of affairs for all of us in this boat.

Personally, though I’m wavering a bit with anxiety and emotions, overall, I know this will get better and work out. I have much to contribute and I’m not willing to give up. I have always managed in the past to achieve my goals and be successful, even though I dropped out of high school at 16 and tested out for my GED.

So, what am I saying here? I’ll attend my online college courses tomorrow. I’ll continue to promote my freelancing opportunities. I’ll try to get through to the Unemployment office again. I’ll let my creditors know what my ongoing situation is. I’ll pray and ask for continued support. And I’ll maintain a positive attitude. Cause that, is what makes me human. That is what makes success. That is what drives us all forward. I have no doubt that I will continue to write code that contributes to progress. I have no doubt I will continue to write stories that bring enjoyment to my readers. I have no doubt that I will continue to move forward.

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